Aged Like a Fine Whine

Children are expected to do things and be things adults no longer feel like doing or being. For example: children are expected to be nice, eat healthy, be active, learn new things, and comply with social standards--whether in a home, a classroom, or in public. The adults who expect these things are often no longer willing to be or do most of them, if any of them at all. They eat "whatever [they] want," do "whatever [they] want," and don't adhere to common social standards of politeness or following rules.

However, the most important thing adults expect of children but not of themselves is an ancient word: resilience (resilience (n.) 1620s, "act of rebounding," from Latin resiliens, present participle of resilire "to rebound, recoil," from re- "back" (see re-) + salire "to jump, leap" (see salient (adj.)).) Legend has it adults were once quite resilient. But, that was millenia ago, recorded on stone tablets in cuneiform ("OG WILL GET OVER IT.")

Adults no longer believe they need to be resilient. From grudges to lawsuits, adults no longer want to trudge through their problems in hope for a better outcome on the other side, because they feel they're beyond that level of thinking. They are eager to be offended by the littlest insult, and eager to litigate over the slightest injury. Adults feel no responsibility for the feelings of other adults, yet play victim to any mistreatment of their feelings. They expect other adults to "deal with it" yet won't "deal with it", themselves. They use the guise of justice to literally justify their cowardice.

What happens between childhood and adulthood that makes humans so--to put it plainly--weak?

Well, life happens. If you, reader, are not an adult yet, let me make this clear for you: adults are worn out from living with other humans, of any age, by their mid-20's. You, yourself, have been exasperated with adults many times over, already. Once you've seen one idiot, you've seen them all, and everyone wants revenge on the idiots in the form of justice.

The funniest thing about that, though, is any adult will tell you they aren't the idiot. They actually believe they are always in the right, even if proven wrong. They actually believe they are faultless until proven, without a semblance of doubt, that they are at fault, and then they'll refute the evidence. There is no introspection, and, if any adult saw this behavior in another adult, they would consider that adult to be childish, even though they would definitely instruct a child in the same situation to accept the consequences of what has happened.

The opposite of resilience, therefore, is entitlement. A resilient person will endure, correct, and forgive. An entitled person will quit, expect, and hold a grudge.

Let's put these two in a situation: Someone wants to buy a pair of shoes, but the cashier sees that the two shoes are each different sizes, and there aren't any more stocked in the back.

Fill in the blanks based on the bolded scenario, above.

The resilient person will ______________.

A. Ask to speak to the manager, then seek an unreasonable solution (i.e., getting a different pair at 90% discount.)

B. Give the shoes to the cashier so no one else tries to buy them, seek to understand the situation, and assure the cashier that it's okay. Then, find a different pair.

C. Take the shoes back to the shelf and punish the store by having someone else go through the same thing, incidentally punishing that person, as well. It's the store's fault in the first place, anyway.

D. Drop the shoes, say nothing, and walk out the store in a huff.

The entitled person will ______________.

A. Do everything but answer B., from above.

B. See B., above.

It's the entitlement of adults which negates their resilience. As mentioned before, by their mid-20's, adults are sick of humanity, and the resentment they feel matures into entitlement. Why hold a grudge? Because they deserve an apology, or penance from their offender. Why file a lawsuit? Because they deserve to be compensated for the wrong-doing.

These same adults don't want children to expect these things when a transgression against a child occurs. Most children want to deal with it, themselves, meaning they'll deal with it in a resilient way, or an entitled way. However, the adults will flat out expect children to be resilient, and, if they're not, they are met with adult-sized ire.

So, kids, eat your fruits and vegetables, exercise regularly, and stay strong. Then maybe you can redefine what adults are by the time the current pool finally dries.