"All You Men Are the Same," said the title.

I'm married (that's a given--I mean, who wouldn't want this) so I don't think about dating as much, anymore. I mean...at all. I don't think about dating at all. However, when it comes to single people, I do recall many persisting issues, my recollection being mostly due to television series where everyone is single--never married, divorced, widowed, or asexual--and has one teenage child. My perspective is, admittedly, skewed from a sexual preference/gender identity standpoint because I'm what they call 'traditional' in every sexual sense and, therefore, have no idea what it's like to be single and sexually alternative in any way. That being said... 

It's in situations of betrayal or heartbreak where many of the singles, especially women, tend to eventually say, "All you men are the same." I've never heard a man say all women are the same, but, as a straight man, I've never had a problem with the similarities shared by women. The problem with the similarities of these men, though, is the women who perceive them as being the same.

Before you cry in outrage, let me share an analogy with you: a woman goes to a restaurant alone and looks over the menu. She's decided a long time ago that she only likes food that is spicy and sweet. Sometimes the food comes out too sweet, sometimes it comes out too spicy, and she loves it best when it's the perfect mixture of both. Every time she has this, her preferred meal, it ends up giving her major heartburn, and there's another burn in another area later on. No matter how balanced the sweet and spicy, it will end up in disaster. She could go for all sweet, but she doesn't like it because it's too sweet. She could go for all spicy, but she doesn't like that, either, because it's too painful and hard to swallow. So, she concludes that every restaurant just serves the same meals, and she's decided she's going to give up eating, altogether.

Naturally, this attitude isn't exclusive to women, it's just I've only ever heard iterations of it from women in reality or media. The attitude is that, just like the meals at the restaurant, all men (or women) are the same. This is not the case. What are all the same? Personality traits.

All personality traits are the same, that's why they can be identified. A mean person will always end up being mean. A nice person will always end up being nice. A cheater will always end up cheating. A loyal person will always end up being loyal. No matter the variations of their behavior, their personality will always win out. This is what dictates the outcome of a relationship.

So, if you want to experience something different, go to a different type of restaurant. Order a meal you've never tried before. If that meal doesn't work out, maybe go back to that restaurant and order another meal outside your norm, maybe even outside your comfort zone. You'll definitely find something you like. The trick is to stick with what's good for you over what you normally go for, even if it takes some time to get used to the experience.

Most importantly: be honest with yourself. Do you do the same thing because you like the hurt? Are you making the same decisions because you've convinced, even trained, yourself to like the bad over the good?

You need to be loved, whether you like it or not. It's one of the most basic necessities of survival. Just make sure you get the nourishment you need, not the gratification that gradually destroys you and leaves you feeling starved.