Pet Peeves in Remission

circa
A big fat tank of sleeping pet peeves sits in your chest. These are not the common pet peeves that have you always on guard, like mouth noises or using object pronouns in place of subject pronouns (and vice versa.) These are pet peeves you forget about, but when they are triggered, will suddenly flare up with a vengeance.

Here's a short list of mine. See if you can relate:
  • When someone walks backwards and acts like it looks cool.
  • When I'm driving and someone comes up really fast in my lane, gets up right behind me, then finally merges, even though they could have merged miles before they got behind me.
  • When I'm accidentally walking to the beat of a dumb song in the store and have to change my pace to break up the syncopation.

  • Again, when I'm driving and someone is coming toward me in the opposite direction and we don't come next to each other until we're both at the most narrow part of the road at the exact same time.

  • When I can't sleep because one line of a movie I've never seen all the way through keeps playing over and over in my mind, and I even start mouthing the words.

  • When I have to stop liking something because someone I don't like says they like it, too.

  • When someone is only an actor because they have a famous family member who's an actor, but they're a bad actor, yet act like they're a good actor so they seem like they're acting like they think it's cool to be bad at acting because they're not capable of being good at it, and all of it's okay because they have a successful family member who's an actor.

  • When sportscasters say, "Blah blah blah blah (statistics), is (athlete's name.)" For example: "He's coming off a 37-point outing against Atlanta, is James Harden."
  • When someone starts too many sentences with dependent clauses in a paragraph, especially if I'm the one who did it.
These are all the ones I've been able to pinpoint. I hope there aren't many more. My tank runneth o'er.

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